The Born Wedding

The lovely couple

 We took a family trip to Florida last weekend to see our dear friends Trevor and Diana get married. Well, I say it was a family trip, but really it was just Tim and Graydon and I. Addie stayed in the Cities with her Grandpa and Lita.

Trevor is in the same year of his ortho residency as Tim, and Diana and I have been friends for the entire three years that we've lived in Rochester. She is a wonderful woman and she has tackled so much in these few short years. She took a huge leap of faith to move to Rochester and while she was here she also managed to earn a new degree and embark on a new career. Not too shabby, Mrs. Born! We were so happy to be there to witness them "formally" unite as a couple.

Trevor waiting for Diana to come down the aisle

Diana looked amazing

The kiss

Our friend Dave was a groomsman

The wedding was beautiful, and I was so happy that we made the effort to head down to Florida. Not least because we wanted to be there for Trevor and Diana, but also because witnessing a wedding allows you to take a step back and reflect. Daily life can be wearing, especially in the field these guys have chosen. It's all toothpaste spatters on the mirror and who is going to mow the lawn and why do we spend so much money at Target, blah blah blah.

But when you pause and take it all in, you remember that we...that you....are doing life together. From the moment you say "I do", your journey is taken with a companion. That's an amazing thing. And that's why we go through all the fuss of the dress and the cake and the vows (especially those) ....because it's worth marking the beginning of that journey. It is a brave and wondrous thing to become someone's life companion. And it's really truly worthy of celebrating.

So we did. We celebrated with nice clothes and drinks and no children (at least no non nursing children), which makes it an occasion in Rochester, letmetellya.

Half of the guys

The other half...they clean up pretty nice!

My only picture of the ladies is "blown out", sadly.

Third years

Diana and the guys

Trevor and his friends

Tim and Justin

We did take the G man to the wedding, and he did a great job. He was very quiet during the crucial parts of the ceremony and he had a great time at the reception. He danced with Diana's godmother and with the bride and with his Mom and Dad. Dancing with Graydon and Tim to Eric Clapton's "Wonderful Tonight" is most definitely engraved on my mental scrapbook of "Why My Life is Awesome."

Waiting quietly in his sweet outfit

Mama and her little man

The wedding was amazing, but it was kind of a weird trip for us overall. It was one of those vacations where things don't really work out the way that you'd like, but it's somehow still fun.

We had great weather the day that we arrived but we didn't take any pictures at the pool because we were tired from traveling and thought "oh we'll do it tomorrow." Life Lesson #267: Don't assume that you'll get a good photo opportunity tomorrow!

We had a delicious seafood dinner that evening and then we collapsed into bed. Only Graydon kept us up from 2 to 7 AM screaming because he apparently does NOT appreciate shellfish.It was a horrible night of handing him off and letting one parent pace with him while the other was resting and then repeating. The poor little man was exhausted and so were we.

We staggered out for breakfast at some point and to find something for me to wear for the wedding. I'd brought the coral dress that I ended up wearing, but I didn't really want to wear that because I felt still somewhat post baby lumpy...if you've had a baby, you know what I mean. But there was only one dress shop within a 45 minute radius and it was selling the kind of dresses that have openings for you to display your belly piercings prominently. Notsomuch what I was looking for, you know? So I decided to wear the coral and smile brightly and worry not at all about the little nursing belly fat that I have left while also resolving to never trust that my husband will be home from work in time for me to shop before a trip.

I resigned myself to the coral dress and we came home to sleep...Graydon, bless his little heart, was so tired he sacked out for three hours.

Delighted to take a nap with NuNu, his bear

We woke up after a much needed nap and decided to take a quick walk on the beach before the wedding. So we got everyone ready to go, including Graydon in his little sun hat.

Add caption

Only to find this the instant we hit the lobby.

Quite the rainstorm

Back to the room went the Ewalds. Fortunately the rest of the night went well and the wedding went off without a hitch.

And then the next day we had to drive from Clearwater Beach back to Orlando ...and we left in plenty of time. Really, we did. But there was a triathlon on the island. And it's an island, people. One way off. And then we got to the airport to find ONE person checking people in for the 11:45 flight. And we were behind a party of 14. No kidding. And then security wouldn't let us go through the family line because we didn't have a stroller. And Graydon had such a massive diaper blowout that he was literally covered in poop from heels to head. And I had to carry him like this through security while he nursed on the go. And when we FINALLY cleared security we ran to our gate to find the plane had moved to a new gate. And we missed the plane. By 60 seconds.

But in the weird way of this vacation, it was fine. An identical flight was leaving one hour later and they put us onto that with no fee and no problems. I was able to change Graydon and feed him properly and he was a champion on the way home. It was weird but good.

We were happily reunited with Addie and she probably hugged us for about five minutes solid. It was wonderful. She had a great time while we were gone, going to the zoo with her grandparents and "helping" Grandpa in the yard and basically being spoiled and loved to death. We missed her, but it was good for us to have some one on one time with Gradycakes.

All in all, a strange but good vacation for our family. Though I may start preparing NOW for our upcoming trip to North Carolina.

Nicknames: Graydon

Graydon has more nicknames than Addie, but there is actually less to explain about them. This conundrum actually makes perfect sense once you think about it. Babies require baby talk. They just do. I'm not saying it's in the parenting contract or anything, but it is virtually impossible to talk to a chubby little package of dimples and rolls and gummy grins without reverting to a mishmash of delicious babble. Anything for a smile and a laugh. And baby talk lends itself naturally to nicknames and terms of endearment, usually cooed in an unusually high voice and often with a sort of speech impediment and some horrid grammatical errors thrown in for good measure. "Ohhh, dere's Mama's wittle punkin, her tweet big fella, oh yes him is." Don't even judge, you KNOW you've done it.


I dare you to look at those huge eyes and sweet cheeks and use the King's English 24/7. Not.Gonna.Happen.















We call Graydon "Graydon" for the most part, and not really Grady or Gray or Aydon or Don or Ray, or any possible other permutation of his name. That may change as he grows but for now his full name remains his daily name. Except of course for the approximately 90% of the time that we call him by one of many nicknames, of which I will highlight only a few.

GrayGray, Gradycakes, and GrayJay (Graydon James) are my run of the mill nicknames for the little man.

We are on our way to his sip and see here. I think he was about eight weeks old at the time.














And maybe here is a good time to say that he just slays me. Seriously. This little guy is so pleasant and so funny. He makes me laugh all the time with his hearty baby belly laugh (most often prompted by his sister's presence) and his smile KILLS me. I posted a video at the bottom of his very first "laughing episode" and it is pretty darn cute, if I do say so myself. The boy likes his Tylenol.(Sidenote: I was giving him Tylenol because he is cutting THREE TEETH. Yes, he is three months old. Steroids are a heckuva drug.) His whole face breaks into a mass of dimples (three!) that are just priceless to me. I'm smitten. Pretty soon I will be doodling his name on my notebook.


Sweet disposition. Just look at those kind eyes.

























Did I mention he's teething? He chews on everything.














Addie and Tim call him "Buddy" more than anything else. Addie says "Hey Buddy!" all the time, which is so darn cute, it kills me. She got that from Tim and she enjoys the fact that they both call Graydon "Buddy", I think. Like it's "their thing".

Graydon is essentially a miniature version of his father, which leads to the nickname Tiny Tim. I'd say this is most often used by Tim's friends. People always thought Addie looked like Tim, but we never really did. She didn't look much like his baby pictures. I thought then, and still think, that Addie resembles my mother and sisters more than anyone else. Graydon, on the other hand, is a dead ringer for his Daddy. I don't like the whole "crippled and starving" Dickensien connotation of Tiny Tim, but it rolls off the tongue a lot easier than "doppelganger" so we'll go with it.

Oh, hi there, miniature Timothy.




























Chubs, Chunk, Pumpkin, PunkinChunkin are the names that highlight our lil porker's porkiness. As featured above. And below. Looking at him beside James Brogan is hilarious. James is 2 weeks younger and about half the G man's size. As Jen says, it's like that movie "Twins" with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito. A couple of side by side shots show that they started out fairly evenly, but now Graydon is literally dwarfing JB. Someone noted that I must have seriously "good" milk because my kids are always chunks. I modestly submit that it is easy to have calorie rich breastmilk if you create it mainly from chocolate.

This was right after Graydon got out of the hospital. Two things: he was still taking a paci and he was SO SKINNY.





























A few weeks later. James is attempting to "catch up" in length by stretching. Graydon's look says "Dude. Don't even play."




























Aaaaaaannnnddd....this was this weekend. Hence the nicknames "Chunk" and "Chip".











And here we have the promised video. I love his laugh. And a funny note: Graydon really likes Tylenol, but so does Addie. She always takes his used baby syringe and sucks the last tiny little bit out of the tip of it. Why doesn't medicine for adults taste so yummy? 

Nicknames: Addie

It feels like forever since my last blog, but it actually wasn't all that long ago. I think everything around here is just changing so quickly that I'm desperate to pin it down before we move on to our next big adventure o' the week.

One thing that is changing around here are the nicknames that we call our babies by on a daily basis. Nicknames are a currency of love around here, and both kids have a lot of them.They also reveal a lot about what is going on in our house at any given moment. This post is all about Miss Adelaide's current nicknames and the next one will be about Graydon.

For instance, I used to call Addie "Sweetness" all the time. And now I'd say I tend towards "Addie-tude" a lot more often. That probably doesn't need an explanation but here it is anyway: Sister rocks a mean attitude these days. She knows what she wants and she wants it yesterday...with sprinkles on top. I spend about half my day thinking she is the cutest thing on Earth and the other half praying to God for the serenity not to spank the bejesus out of her hind end.

Scenario 1: Addie likes to play in the dog food. Addie is not allowed to play in the dog food. Addie knows this full well. Addie does it anyway.

One particular day she crept away to strew dog food all over the sunroom several times (each time I was nursing) because I kept forgetting to close the door after I'd let our panting dogs have access to their water. She did this at night, after Tim was home,and I thought "Oh thank heavens, the Enforcer can deal with it." So down to the sunroom goes Tim, full of righteous irritation and wearing a stern face. He confronted our darling daughter by saying "Addie. Why are you in the dog food? You know this is wrong." She looked at him and said "I'm crazy!" Down goes stern face in a flood of laughter. So much for that.

Scenario 2: I'm sick as a dog on Friday evening and I'd called my husband, filled with a faint but desperate hope that he'd be home soon. He informs me that he is not even close to being done, thus invoking Residency Law #4: Thy spouse will never have a short day when thou art sick. I haul my aching carcass into the shower, hoping that this will refresh me enough to get through the four hours until bedtime because Residency Law #12 has already been invoked that day: Thy children will never nap when thou art sick. I put on a movie for Addie and take Graydon into the bathroom with me. Normally, Addie is very intent on any TV time that she gets. I get out to perfect silence and silently thank God because I know she has fallen asleep.

Not so much. No, Addie has opened the fridge and is cracking eggs all over the floor and rug. When I asked (ok, maybe I shrieked) what she was doing, she calmly said "Easter Eggs."

Looks contrite, doesn't she? Or not!













She is into everything. Every.Thing.

Spare moment? Oh, I'll just run some water in the sink, strip down, and play. No problem.














Bored in the car? Do a little face painting to pass the time.



















I posted a video at the bottom of the post that details another escapade where she slipped outside after her nap. The ability to open doors and drawers is seriously an overrated achievement. Parents, keep your children ignorant for as long as you can.

And tantrums? Addie-tude loves a good tantrum, preferably where she can watch herself. A favorite place is in front of our French doors where she can really appreciate the effect of her screaming and rolling and kicking. Or in front of our oven. Or in a department store in front of a mirror. Honest to goodness, she will carry on in Oscar worthy fashion, pause to take in the effect, and then renew her efforts. It's unreal.

This stuff is funny but it's also totally wearing because NOTHING affects her discipline wise. I've spanked. I've yelled. I've "timed her out" a gajillion times. I've ignored. I've cajoled. I've bribed (this works). I'VE LOST THE BATTLE OF WILLS. TO A TWO YEAR OLD.

So, now we have a new plan. We're doing some research and deciding on a discipline plan that both Tim and I will practice all the time. Right now our discipline really varies from parent to parent and according to our level of patience at the time. So we're going to read all about the Love and Logic approach and go from there. We have some friends that have really praised that approach, so we'll see how the Ewalds fare with that. Because we've lost the battle, but not the war! Yet.

The other big nickname for Adelaide these days is "Princess". We didn't raise Addie to be a "diva", but apparently that is who she is. She wants to wear a skirt or a dress every single day.

At the playground in her tutu













She has two Disney Princess nightgowns that I have to sneak into the wash. And she wants to wear her patent leather Mary Janes or her fuchsia Crocs every single day. She actually hid her sneakers.
She loves tutus, glitter, makeup, stickers, fairies, ballerinas, and princesses. Oh, and unicorns. We seriously discuss all of these things about 12 time a day.

Covered in stickers in one of her favorite nightgowns


















I honestly don't mind this, and frankly, I think it's pretty adorable.We just wanted her to be empowered to do whatever she wants and if she wants to be a cheerleader instead of the basketball player, I've got no issue with that. There are a lot of different ways to be a girl and I love this really "girly girl" aspect of her personality.

If you find it hard to believe that this face belongs to the author of so much chaos....















Well, so do we. But we wouldn't change her for the world.















I'll talk about Graydon in my next post...but here's a sneak peek of Mr. Wonderful.



















And here is the promised video of more Addie shenanigans. The batteries died but her answer to my question "Do you think this is a good idea?" is "This fun."

Sweet Surrender

I originally intended to write a blog post about the kidlets and how they are changing. After a few minutes of staring blankly at the screen and thinking "I'm really tired", I realized that post has to wait for a more mentally alert time.

Sleep is in short supply for me these days, as my kids are taking turns changing their habits. Hence, the lack of blogging.I thought I had this "two kids" thing all figured out and then, sure enough, they went and changed on me. It helps to remember that this is only a short term exhaustion. And I'm learning how to surrender to the inevitable...even when it doesn't quite fit my plans.

Addie has dropped her nap, much to my dismay. No, really, MUCH to my dismay. She is still taking a nap once every three or four days, but most of the time, we've got nothing in the rest department. I battled this for quite some time and then realized that I needed to go with the flow and let her change. I was just frustrating both of us by insisting that she lie in bed. Frankly, we've got enough battles to fight with Miss Addie right now (ah, two year olds!) and we need to just let it be and let her be.

I kept finding her sleeping in weird positions, obviously having collapsed in exhaustion mid tantrum.













So now the plan is to just let her stay in her room and have quiet time for two hours. I put her in her room, put up her baby gate and go tend to Graydon. After he's asleep, I come in and read to her for about half an hour. Then I leave. If she falls asleep, great. If not, that's ok. I usually walk into her room after her two hour "rest" time to find sheer chaos. But again, it's about the surrender here. Because really, it's not a big deal to clean up. She helps me put away all her messes and we both feel relaxed for having had a break.

Addie's room, post "nap". Note the stool on her bed (?!?)













I eventually had to take the crayons away for her "craft table" because everything in the room was getting "decorated", including the walls. Thank God for Mr. Clean Magic Erasers.















And as I'm writing this, the G man is currently howling in his crib as he "cries it out". I really really hate this process, but I know it's necessary for everyone's mental health. We waited until six months to do this with Addie, and I think it would have been a shorter process had we started it sooner.

My parenting philosophy after two kids is pretty much "whatever you want in the first three months, you can have!". You want me to hold you all night while you nurse every hour or so?(Graydon) Sure thing. You want a vacuum cleaner howling? (Graydon) You got it. You like your swing? Sleep in there all day, my child. (Addie) You want to sleep in your car seat every night (Addie). Absolutely.

After three months? Then it's time to learn how to cope without Mama being there 24/7. You see, Graydon too has to learn to surrender...in this case, to sleep and self soothing. It's an awful thing and it's not very restful for either of us. But he's ready. So now we just have to tough it out.

This helps. A lot. Love to see my kiddos cuddling together. Addie very thoughtfully "shared" her doll with Graydon.














And to finish a somewhat random "Good heavens I'm tired, is this even making sense" post, some random pictures from an afternoon walk a few weeks ago. Better luck posting next time, self!