Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Baby E2 FAQs

I thought I'd answer some of the frequently asked questions that I get about this pregnancy. If you've asked some of these, sorry, this might be a little bit redundant. But I thought it would be nice for this baby to someday be able to read exactly what I was thinking while I was carrying him/her! And if there is anything that you'd like to know that I didn't answer, just ask!

How are you feeling?
This is the standard, right? Every pregnant woman gets this on a regular basis for the whole of the 30+ weeks that people know. And the answer is "Good!". By and large, I can't complain. I do have terrible heartburn every single day, without fail. And I feel a lot of pressure and heaviness in my womb that I don't remember with Addie. (My friend Jen speculates that this is the scar tissue from the C section giving way, since she is experiencing the same thing.) And sometimes I have trouble sleeping because I have to pee three times a night, and the baby is always so pleased with the extra room that it does some serious gymnastics by way of celebration. But honestly, those are pretty minor things.

Carrying this baby has been a really pleasant experience for me...if you don't consider the first trimester! We'll see how this goes as I continue to grow, because I'm already having some trouble tying my shoes and such. :-)

Do you think you're having a boy or a girl?

I go back and forth. I'm terrible at predicting genders. It's almost always the opposite of what I think ...for instance, I was sure Addie was a boy.

For what it's worth, this pregnancy has been exactly the same as my pregnancy with Addie. Same icky first trimester, same wretched heartburn, same super active baby, same "ambiguous" heart rate (between 140 and 150). This leads me to suspect "girl", but that probably guarantees a boy, knowing my track record! And I've had friends that have experienced identical pregnancies and had different genders and friends that swear it's different carrying a boy vs. a girl. So I guess we'll see which camp I fall into in December.

What do you want, a boy or a girl?
If I'm being really super honest, I think I'd like another little girl. In part because these two will only be two years apart, and I think it would be great to have a sibling of the same sex so close in age. And in part because then I can use all of Addie's things for this baby, because they're being born at the exact same time of year. And in part because I love little girls and I'd like a houseful of them!

Now, obviously, I'd be delighted with a little boy too. After all, it would be a new experience to have a little boy. We're all about new adventures in the Ewald household. And I think that Tim feels about boys the way that I feel about girls...ie, he wouldn't mind a houseful of sons. I'd feel almost more excited for him than I would for myself. Almost.

It's a win/win situation, really, and that's a great place to be. And now I'm really excited thinking about meeting this little person. (Insert squeal here).

How can you stand not knowing?
I hear this one a lot. Honestly, it was difficult the first time, with Miss A. I was very tempted to find out. This time, it's not even on my radar. I honestly don't want to know until it's time and I'm holding this little bundle.

I think this boils down to one main thing for me. I completely understand why people want to find out, and I don't have any sort of judgment or superiority complex about finding out vs. not finding out. I think people should just do what they want to do.

However, having experienced this with Addie, I just can't imagine that finding out from your ultrasound is anything like finding out as you meet your child. You have to really imagine yourself letting the anticipation build for months, then going through all the drama and intensity of labor, and then having your husband be the person to tell you "We have a ..." right as you see your child's face for the first time. That's a moment you can't top, and you can't ever forget. It's dramatic, it's beautiful, and it's an incredible bonding experience. Even if you are coming out of anesthesia and are slightly surprised to be alive.

What names do you like?
We seriously have a list of about five or six names for each sex. We don't care about people knowing them, but we tend not to tell folks just because we're bound to change our minds. I think what we learned with Rowan...er...Adelaide...is that we have to see the baby to really know what we want. And that we're better off just staying mum about it until we've decided, aka the birth certificate is filled out.

Are you having another c-section?
Good Lord willing, and the creek don't rise, NO! Granted, my threshold this time around is lower than a first time mother's threshold for a C section. They don't want my uterus to blow out like a bald Michelin. So it's a possibility. Though I do hope to at least stay conscious for this one, even if I go to section.

If I have my way...or rather, if I stick to my way...I'll have a natural birth. Yes, sans drugs. One of the mostly unknown (to the general public) side effects of an epidural is a slowage/stoppage of labor. And that's what happened to me. It took me SIX HOURS to get my last measly cm out of the way. That's craziness. And if I had been able to walk around, change positions, or even just move my legs, I might have been able to coax Addie into a better position. Little stubborn one just refused to turn her head for us (what a shock!) and we couldn't do much to encourage her to change her angle. Hence, our label of "failure to progress" despite the fact that full grown men were attempting to bodily drag her out of me with large salad tongs.

Believe me, I envy people that can get drugs and sleep through their dilation. I remember the full blown contractions (2 mins apart, lasting a minute apiece) very well. I seem to remember desperately wanting to escape from my own body. But experience tells us that I am not that person that is destined to be a happy labor sleeper, and I'd rather labor for six hours or so than have to deal with abdominal surgery recovery for six weeks. Especially with a two year old.

I say this now, of course. We'll see if Tim can help me remember this when I'm in transition! He may have to print this out. (That's a joke, Tim. Don't even think about it!)

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